Father, forgive them...

When they came to the place called The Skull, there they crucified Him and the criminals, one on the right and the other on the left. But Jesus was saying, "Father, forgive them; for they do not know what they are doing." And they cast lots, dividing up His garments among themselves. And the people stood by, looking on. And even the rulers were sneering at Him, saying, "He saved others; let Him save Himself if this is the Christ of God, His Chosen One."…

  

                                                                        Luke 23:33-35

 

 
When I was getting my Associate’s degree at a local community college my English professors gave me the best writing (and ultimately preaching) advice I’ve ever received. She wrote at the bottom of my paper, “Heidi, Life is too short. You should only write the words you cannot stop yourself from writing.” Since my professor wrote that to me over five years ago, I’ve tried to devote myself to writing the difficult words that I cannot stop myself from writing—the words that I want to sugarcoat or altogether sensor myself from writing. It’s like what the Old Testament prophet Jeremiah asserts, “If I say, “I will not mention him, or speak any more in his name,” there is in my heart as it were a burning fire shut up in my bones, and I am weary with holding it in, and I cannot” (Jeremiah 20:9).

In yesterday’s blog post I wrote and used the example of the corporate sin of the American church. I think this is a major example of corporate sin, but obviously it is by no means the only guilty community. The point is that we are all complicit in a violent, God-denying, exclusive, love-crucifying world. Owning the dark pieces of the church’s story helps us own the dark pieces of our own stories so we can keep our hearts humble and honest before God and open for true repentance. Repentance means to turn around, to reorient oneself, to return home. Repentance leads us to redemption, which leads us to new life.

At the end of the day, corporate and individual confession is about admitting we are blind and cannot see the world the way Jesus does. God opens our eyes through the humble posture of Confession, and we are awakened to see Jesus hanging from the cross only to discover the bloodied hammer in our own hands. There is an old hymn that states the question, “Were you there when they crucified my Lord?” The haunting and terrible answer to that hymn’s question is: Yes. We were there. We ARE there. Jesus is still being crucified in our world today. Yet, too often we live our lives blinded to this reality. However, if we are awakened to this unsettling reality, in that moment of drowning guilt, shame, and despair—Jesus, in struggling breaths from the cross speaks out, “Father, forgive them; for they do not know what they are doing.”

The Divine forgiveness that comes after Confession isn’t a self-justification, it doesn’t mean there won’t be consequences, it doesn’t mean that the wounds we have left on the world will disappear, especially because every healed (“forgiven”) wound leaves a scar. However, the Good News is that Divine forgiveness means that Jesus hasn’t given up on us yet. Jesus believes that you and me, the Church and our world, is still worth saving. Somehow, despite our bloodied hands, maybe we can still find new life in a desperately hopeless place. Can new life possibly come from an Empire’s cross? Or within the stone sealed grave of religious protocol? Can new life be found in the broken, illegitimate, and improper body of Mary’s son?

“If I were to define Christian perfection, I should not say that it is a perfection of striving but specifically that it is the deep recognition of the imperfection of one’s striving, and precisely because of this a deeper and deeper consciousness of the need for grace, not grace for this or that, but the infinite need infinitely for grace…”(Kierkegaard; Journal II, page 1482—written in 1851)

 

~ Heidi Johnson